Sports Miserability Index

So the Phillies won the World Series. Congrats to them. Quite a big deal had been made about Philadelphia's championship drought as it had been 25 years since the 76ers won the city's most recent championship in 1983.

So now the distinction of four sport city having gone the longest without a championship falls my city of residence, Minneapolis. The Twins' World Series title in 1991 is the region's last major title. This is a streak that looks to grow unless the Twins and/or the Wild can do something about it, as neither the Vikings nor the Timberwolves (especially the Timberwolves) seem to make the proper decisions to put together a team that can make a serious push at a title.

But I am left with the question: Where does Minneapolis rank as far as major sports cities and their suffering/level of misery? Well, I was pretty bored at work, so I comprised some answers as to metro regions that can't seem to put together championship teams.

With Minneapolis, the Twins, Vikings, Wild, Timberwolves, North Stars, and Lakers have played a total of 154 seasons (not included 1994 baseball season as there was no champ). In those 154 seasons, Minneapolis has won 7 titles. That doesn't sound all that bad until you realize that 5 of those were by the Lakers before they moved to L.A. in 1960, which was before we had any other teams here. So since the Lakers moved, Minneapolis has won 2 titles in 142 seasons, both by the Twins. Pretty bad. We lost our only historically successful franchise (who went on to win 9 more titles post relocation) along with the beloved North Stars. We don't have the best fortunes here.

But is it the worst? I don't think so. Here are some other cities that can make a case for top misery. (I only counted NFL seasons starting with 1966, the first year of the Super Bowl. Also, I did count seasons spent in the ABA by current NBA teams.)

*Atlanta has all four major sports, but only one title, that being the Braves' 1995 World Series title. One title in a total of 140 seasons played. Not good.
*Cleveland has 2 World Series titles, but the last came in 1948. The Browns have never won a Super Bowl, and the city even lost the team for 3 seasons. The Cavaliers have not contributed a title either, but do have Lebron James...for now. That's a total of 181 seasons played with 2 titles.
*Buffalo has never won a title in the 87 seasons the Bills, Sabres, and the NBA's Bullets combined to play.
*San Diego also has never won a title, with the Padres, Chargers, and brief stints by the NBA's Rockets and Clippers combining for 91 seasons played. Plus they've lost two NBA teams. At least they have the weather going for them.
*The Rockets did bring two titles to Houston though, something that the Astros, Texans, and the former Oilers were never able to do for the town. That's 2 titles in 120 seasons.
*Kansas City has 2 titles, one by the Royals, one by the Chiefs, despite having had all four sports at some point in time. Two titles in 109 seasons.
*The Diamondbacks 2001 World Series win over the Yankees brought Phoenix its only title in 82 seasons played by the Diamondbacks, Cardinals, Suns, and Coyotes.
*Seattle may have a claim for top suffering as well. The Mariners have never even made it to a World Series in 31 seasons, plus the city had then lost the Pilots after only one season. The Seahawks have made it to one Super Bowl in 32 seasons, but came up short. Only the Supersonics have ever brought a title to the town, winning one NBA title in 3 appearance they made in the Finals over the course of 41 seasons. But the Sonics did just move to Oklahoma City. Poor Seattle.

What about the other end of the spectrum though? Well, not too many surprises.

*New York (including NJ teams as they're part of the NY metro area) has had 53 titles in 586 total seasons played. This includes the Yankees, Mets, Giants, Dodgers, Jets, NFL's Giants, Knicks, Nets, Devils, Islanders, and the NHL Rangers. Lucky bastards have had ELEVEN teams!
*Boston has 33 titles in 340 seasons played. Kinda makes you hate their whiny fans a little more huh?
*Despite no longer having an NFL team, Los Angeles has done fine with 17 titles in 265 seasons played.
*The motor city kitties may suck, but thanks in large part to the Red Wings Detroit has enjoyed 18 titles in 278 seasons.
*Toronto has three major teams and 15 titles in 134 seasons played (thanks to the Leafs).

And yeah, Philly is kinda in the middle with 13 titles in 298 seasons played.

This "research" by me is by no means a perfect way to assess a city's sports miserable level, but it at least kept me occupied at work, which means I got paid to do it.